Dear Sperm,

We decided to sit this cycle out while my husband works on his sperm. His primary doctor gave him androgel (testosterone) in a low dose saying that if we increase his testosterone minimally it could help sperm. I'm pretty sure that doctor is a jack hole because if you google androgel it's infamous for making sperm counts go to ZEE-ROW. So husband stopped taking it and he's got an appointment with the RE tomorrow to discuss other options. HCG or HSG? I should know the difference but I don't. Hopefully he'll get on something that will help and we won't be shooting blanks during iui. In other news, being a step parent is so hard. You can be so good to the kids and sacrifice much of yourself for them as their mom can plant one petty idea in their head and then they turn around and smack the hell out of you. I signed up for it because I married my husband, I just had no idea how hard it would be. My first instinct when I don't like a situation is just to run. It's kind of all I know. It's what I do. It's what my mother did. Sticking this storm out is a huge lesson for me. Anyway, that's super off subject of this blog but I suppose I needed to get it off my chest. Oh and I went back to my old job. The job I've had on and off for over 10 years. It feels like home to be back and it's a nice escape from being an infertile step-mom housewife. Ugh that title just looks so ugly. Not what I envisioned for my life. God knows better and His plans are bigger makes sense even if I can't see it, right? Be blessed.